Cutesy heroes

Marvel's got this new animated series, "Super Hero Squad" (sample video here). It's obviously targeted at the much younger set with its cutesy portrayal of our favourite Marvel mainstays rendered in the proportion of children: that is, oversized heads and extremities on tiny bodies. And they have childlike personalities to match. So I should have known better when I picked up the Wii game of the same title that I'd be getting a product that wasn't quite designed for my venerable demographic.

Don't get me wrong, I'm much taken by the premise and the characters. It's reminiscent of how kids would co-opt the superhero concept and play out their own superhero scenarios with their ridiculous and nonsensical storylines, while exaggerating their characters to the nth degree. In the game (as is presumably in the series) the children at play are versatile and talented voice-acting pros like Charlie Adler (Cow & Chicken), Tom Kenny (Mr S Squarepants, esq.), and Tara Strong (PPG's Bubbles, and a vast range of other animated characters). In their SHS incarnation, Thor is pompous and bombastic; Cap Am is more patronizing than patriotic; Silver Surfer is a philosophising surfer dude; and Doc Doom is as inept as he is maniacal. It all makes for a rib-tickling, madcap adventure to play through.

The Wii SHS is a simplistic beat-'em-up with elements of an adventure platformer as well as an arena for a tournament-style punch-up. By playing through the adventure mode (either solo or co-op) we gain points to unlock new characters and arenas for battle mode. Um, that's essentially it.

Adventure mode is a button-mash with the occasional controller flick to pull off special moves. We mash our way through a maze, punching or blasting hoards of goons and navigating annoying jumping puzzles until the end level boss battle which takes place arena style. Battle mode basically plays by sumo wrestling rules: either wear down your opponent or toss his a** out of the ring. In adventure mode, we do either 10 times to beat the boss -- before he does unto you the same. Full battle mode dispenses with all pretence of a story and pits your choice of heroes and villains against each other in team or solo combinations.

The game isn't any more complex than that. I guess I could entertain a certain someone below 10 a whole afternoon with SHS, but there isn't much else there to sustain my interest after the first run-through in adventure mode. It's cute, it's funny, it's another perspective of the Marvel Universe that doesn't take itself too seriously. It's got strong production values, but I found gameplay rather less than satisfactory. I should just have waited for the animated DVD box set to get my SHS fix.

What a frog wants

The good news is that my voice is coming back. I may still be coughing like a nicotine addict on cold turkey, but there is volume when I crank my amps up, and I am able to reach the higher notes once again while bathroom singing.

As for the frog in my throat, I've decided to just give it what it wants until it goes away. It wants water, in much greater quantity than I've ever felt the need. What I didn't realize in the last couple of weeks consulting was that such an unaccustomed increase in free talk-time requires a corresponding increase of fluid intake to sufficiently lubricate the vocal chords. So, I haven't been drinking enough and I dried up, figuratively and literally.

Today, I've been lubing up with unchilled Pink Dolphin, some kind of mineral water with a mild peach flavour that the canteen sells. Oh, I see... it's got added vitamins for a healthier kick too. No wonder the price was a bit steep.

Yes, I know. I would have avoided all this trouble if I had listened to all the "drink more water" advice from friends in the first place. For the rest of this remaining week, me and my Pink Dolphin will be inseparable.

Puppy love

Some days, we just have to admire the tenacity of the bond between dog lovers and their dogs. Q-tip has done a massive purge in the bathroom AND the bedroom. While I was surveying the damage, Mimi, prevented from reaching the tray by the mess, promptly peed in the kitchen.

Pardon me while I go fetch the mop. My tears are forming a little puddle on the laminate floor.

A ball of string looks at another

Everything is string. I spent an afternoon examining plasticized human remains and concluded that we are held together by string, we move through and interact with our environment by precisely manipulating string, and we are entirely composed of string: a sentient winding of bundled knots and fibres. We're essentially a rag-doll puppet moving on its own power.

Of course, there's different kinds of string -- different textures, different elasticities, different compositions even. Nerve fibre is different from tendon, which is different from veins and capillaries, which is different from muscle tissue, which is different from bone matter... but however you look at it, it's all just string.

The idea is mildly unsettling. We think of ourselves as more than just cables and wiring all twisted together, but that's all that remains of us when the spark of life has left the body. These bodies have been lovingly and carefully preserved and sculpted by the exhibitors so we, the living, can see ourselves in these frozen, exploded images and marvel at the "piece of work that is a man" -- before walking out the front door looking to stuff ourselves with more junk food, indulge in more bad habits that will undoubtedly hasten our own impending necrosis in the days to come.

I admit, it got to me. Side by side with healthy specimens were also diseased ones to show how their donors probably met their ends. There were aneurysms; cancers; tar-blackened lungs; fatty-smooth, engorged livers; shrunken, overworked kidneys; a heart enlarged by stress and strain; and a couple of genetic abnormalities too. All the time I was wondering if the donors could see themselves inside-out as we can them now, would they have changed their habits, their diets or addictions in exchange for a few more years of life?

Am I going to change mine? This twist of string, yarn, twine, fibre, tubing, wire all compactly woven into the thing that is me could perhaps do with some slightly healthier habits. Starting tomorrow.

Body Worlds is at the Singapore Science Centre until March 2010, in case any other woolly tangle of string is interested to go see.

Careful, she bites!

Happy Halloween! In keeping with tradition, a horror movie was on the cards. And since I've been left to my own devices (wife and in-laws are in BKK), my pick flick was "Jennifer's Body". Might as well be as no one I know would watch it with me.

Megan Fox plays a nasty, evil carnivore looking to spill blood and gore as she feasts on human entrails. But all that's just metaphorical as the movie focuses on her BFF, "Needy", and all the fears and insecurities of a teenage girl growing up.

Best friends are forever, right? But what if your best friend turned into a monster overnight? What if your best friend starts behaving in ways your mother told you never to? What if she makes it a point to steal your boyfriend and other boys that show an interest in you?

For the boys, there's always the fear that if an attractive girl shows interest in you, it must be too good to be true. And many times, it is. At the back of your mind, you know that all she wants is a piece of you -- and in Jennifer's case, lots of pieces. It's the fear of the male black widow spider; the male preying mantis; egged on by the need to fertilize, yet helpless to change his fate.

And remember mother's advice about never getting into a strange van with strange boys? Yep, that's what kicks off this gruesome morality play in the first place. Jennifer is never quite the same after that night.

"Jennifer's Body" is horror in the category of teenager vs monster with superpowers. More thrill than chill, really. What's interesting is that the fears are both common and real, though we don't usually think of them as particularly monstrous. They are fears we eventually outgrow, but to a teenager experiencing them, it sometimes does feel like something's eating away at one's insides. Her name, we know now, is Jennifer.

The tadpole has blossomed

Completed a marathon week of consults with the kids. Never talked so much in all my life. Every consult, whether small group or lone student seems to go by so quickly. Before I know it, the next consult has arrived and awaits my attention. This goes on pretty much the whole day, with a break for some lunch in between.

I'm actually having fun 'cos as I go over questions I keep unearthing new ideas while I practice sharing them with the kids in terms they can understand. It's great when they do, but when they don't, it's an opportunity to try harder and come up with some kind of explanation, even an analogy, that does work.

Like this one consult who wrote a generally decent enough essay including a point on how international cooperation is increasing in the area of environmental conservation. Then he promptly followed up with an example: the failure of the Kyoto Protocol in getting the USA to ratify the agreement. O_o I asked him why he produced this piece of evidence, he said it was an example he recalled from his revision notes. Every claim must have an example and this was an example, was it not?

Indeed, it was an example. But it's like a defence attorney asserting that the defendant did not commit the murder, and here's the bloody dagger with his fingerprints all over the handle to prove it.

That's the danger of blindly applying formula, doing things because one must because it is integral to the formula, rather than for a reason and a purpose towards developing a logical argument. I believe he got my point, and hopefully he won't make the same mistake again.

Anyway, I didn't mean to relate that story. What I did want to say is that after a week of near non-stop talk for hours on end, the tadpole from last week has blossomed into a full-blown bullfrog in my throat. Henceforth I shall be known as the Hoarse Whisperer. I'm taking a vow of silence to last me through the weekend. Maybe the rest will restore my golden honeyed tones once again, allowing me to survive one last (packed) week of consults before (finally) the Finals.

Nerdy English teacher

Just kicking back and playing with the Times Online Spelling Bee training games. That's so uncool in a nerdy English teacher kind of way.

Maybe I should recommend the URL to my kids in case they need to take an educational break from their preparations for their finals? Sure,why not? And while I'm at it, I should wipe off the smears on my glasses and replace the pencil that's fallen out of my pocket protector too.

Sorry, what? Oh, A-P-O-G-E-E....

We won? Wha...?

I am in shock. Despite my spectacular FAIL-ed presentation on Monday, we still came up tops in the final vote tally. That'll teach me to think that I alone carried the hopes and dreams of the team, and that my failure amounted to the group's failure. All in all, it was the strength of the team and our collective efforts that carried the vote and earned the recognition, not the flash and splash (and crash) of the presentation that followed.

Though I wouldn't underestimate the power of the sympathy vote, I am truly humbled by this odd turn of events. Thank you, team; and thank you, voters!

Culture of excess

Funny that I was just discussing with the kids the concept of our "culture of excess", and this evening when I watched "Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs" with the usual bunch of delinquents, there was a movie that embodied the implications of such a culture and its terrible impact on us if we can't find an "off" switch to hit, and quickly too.

Our culture of excess is the result of our success at turning every natural resource available into food or other consumables for our convenience. Like the food making machine in "Meatballs", our own industrial processes have gone into overdrive, cranking out more, bigger, better(?)... things, and as fast as they can crank, we likewise guzzle, utilize and (up)chuck, like we were in a race to see who would break down and give up first.

At first, it's all good. People need food to live and to have a constant supply of food might well be like it all just fell from the sky. But the more people get, the more people want until the whole system is all about providing more than is possible to want, without heed to the consequences. That is, until disaster strikes then we do what we do best -- survive, and learn from the experience.

But instead of being preachy, "Meatballs" provides a such banquet of laughs and gags that the idea and need for social responsibility over indiscriminate consumption is easy to swallow.

The goat

Sometimes, you get a crazy idea and you run with it like a baton in the 4x100m. You think that's the innovation that's going to win it for the team and you get carried away with the euphoria of being the hero for once. Then next thing you know, you've tripped over your own feet and you're face-down in the mud. Once again, as always, the goat.

But my friends are the understanding sort. They entertain, even encourage my crazy ideas even though that usually results in a downward-spiralling pyre of disaster. And if I crash and burn, well, it was a high-risk, high-return play that didn't pan out the way we'd hoped. Oh, well.

After so many disappointments, hope they'll still have faith in me and my crazy ideas. Some day, I'm gonna get it right.

X-species oral interfacing

As a pet owner, do I kiss my pets on the mouth? Some pet owners do, apparently, and Ronnie Lim opens up on his fears that doing so may cause diseases to jump between dog and his best friend as a result. That's just paranoia and sensationalizing his point. There is a much greater likelihood of people passing on diseases to other people through a face-to-face liplock than some exotic new infection blossoming between the species. And even then, we're not going to stop people from snogging each other, are we?

There's a simpler reason for not kissing pets on the mouth. One word answer: Yuck! Two word answer: That's gross! Q-tip's a sweet little thing, but her dogbreath would corrode galvanized sheet metal. And no way I'm kissing my cats on the mouth. I have no desire to go to the hospital and have them surgically removed from my face for no good reason. Not that there is a good reason for that -- ever.

So, Ronnie, as far as I can tell, too few of us are into French-ing our poodles to storm the Bastille over the issue. Thanks for overreacting.

GP has a gender -- she's female

I am going to start thinking about GP essay questions as if they had been asked by women. I hear tell when women ask questions, they aren't looking for answers. Neither are they looking for solutions. Try give a woman a solution and at best it's irrelevant, at worst it's just wrong. Then she'll cry and become completely incomprehensible. Where and how the 'F' grade came about, we'll never know after that.

No. If a woman asks a question, it's because there's something on her mind that she wants to discuss. She may not be entirely clear what it is exactly, but that's why she needs someone to talk to while she she sorts out her own mind about it. Most importantly, she just wants to be heard, preferably understood and above all, respected for her position on the issue.

When attempting GP essays, the kids tend to behave like a man dealing with a woman's question. Get to the point, solve the problem, bada boom, bada bing, pass the beer, we're outta here. Handle a woman like that and it's the couch for you tonight, buddy. You'll be lucky to have a blanket keep you company while you shiver in the dark.

A GP essay is not an answer, and it definitely is not a solution. It is the question itself -- expanded through the gentle teasing out and exploration of its inherent nuances and issues, insecurities and complexities as it ponders the validity of its own biases.

The essay therefore behaves more like the listening ear of a sympathetic confidante than Mr Fixit with a Stanley toolbelt. There's a lot of "do you mean...?", "I recognise...", "I identify with...", "I understand where you're coming from because...", but of course in less informal conversational language. She wants to know your position on the issue, though she is not threatened if you have an opposing opinion from her's (she's a woman -- your opinions, however interesting, are still wrong) but in the grand scheme of things, all she wants is to have her views aired, discussed, evaluated in a non-judgemental way and, as the really wise man already knows, the conclusion is hers to make though he may have gently led her there through the discussion.

Like a question from GP, when a woman asks a question, it's an invitation to a conversation, so engage her, even indulge her, at the intellectual level. Do not offer her a screw from the Fixit toolbelt as is our usual knee-jerk reaction... though she could be more receptive later, when she's in a better mood.

Silenced

I have suddenly, inexplicably and literally lost my voice. Woke up yesterday with a bad throat, but thought it would subside as the day went on. Didn't happen. Thought I would sleep it off last night. Didn't happen either.

Fortunately, the medical prognosis seems optimistic. My meds are just a throat spray (minty!) and a course of antibiotics for the inflammation. The bigger worry is how to resume consulting kids without aggravating my current condition?

Well, let's see if one more night's sleep will do the trick.

KOREF, Day 2

A bit late for sunrise, but Jojo leads us in a session of sun salutations to greet the new day.

Since we're on an organic rice farm every meal is based around, you guessed it, organic brown rice. We're looking at brown nasi lemak for brekkie which was quite good especially with the sweet but totally non-lethal Level 1/2 sambal chilli. Fresh food is always nice, but I still have yet to acquire a taste for brown rice, unfortunately.

Modern rice farming techniques have dispensed with little old ladies beating the heck out of rice sheaves to extract rice grains. Here we have a threshing machine operated by a guy sitting on top (not shown in pix) while the de-husked rice grains fill the sack below.

Secret of eco farming: many of the farmhands are short-term international volunteers who basically work for board and lodging, having eschewed the decadence of modern living, and who are in their own way doing their bit to advance the cause of responsible, eco-friendly food production methods.

After a briefing on how to operate a sickle, we're sent off to the fields to harvest rice. It would probably have been back-breaking work if we had put our heart and soul into it, but we were mugging for the camera most of the time while enjoying the mud spa that we'd been sunk to our knees in. That was one muddy field. Heh, typical tourists.

Bonus: a chance to observe a sweet potato harvest as well. These were also organically grown and there were some whoppers that got dug up -- bigger than anything I've ever seen at our local markets. The champ was a monster that tipped the scale at 13kg.

Our last stop before arriving back home was a Malaccan dessert place in Kluang. We hadn't had anything this ice-cold for the last couple of days and this was a seriously welcome treat. The cendol was sticky, molasses-sweet, not overpowering with the lemak (coconut milk) flavour and most importantly, refreshing. Next stop: home.

Great little weekend getaway, though city-boy that I am, I doubt I could stay sane there for too long, starved of electronic entertainment. Nevertheless, it was fun to be out in the sunshine and physically interact with the environment: touching things, getting dirty, entertaining the possibility of encountering some unfamiliar, potentially dangerous critter residing in the murky, muddy depths... but nothing like that did actually show up.

Must thank Jojo for organizing this little trip. The company may not have been familiar, but proved to be quite comfortable and entertaining in their own way, anyway.

Lots more pix: click here.

KOREF, Day 1

This is the party that finally made it to KOREF (Kahang Organic Rice Eco Farm). We've got reps from across the depts: English, Chinese, PE, Bio, Chem. Definitely not the usual suspects.

First thing after lunch was a river trek. Initially, I thought we would be walking ALONG the river, not IN it. Here, the main party gets stuck in shin-deep mud. Our party is following immediately behind them.

We get separated from the main body as June lost one of her Crocs in the mud. After much blind digging around, churning up handfuls of clay and rocks I finally grab a rubbery substance and pull it to the surface. June is relieved to have a reunification. Jojo and Derek remained behind with us to help search, and eventually the four of us caught up with the main body at the end of the trail.

The river trek (which is best negotiated sans footwear because of the clingy mud) is hell on bare feet with lots of unseen pokey bits, slippery surfaces and lots of opportunities for toe stubbing. Expect extreme exfoliation and slight bruising of the feet from the experience. But OMG, the walk was tres fun not in spite of the danger but BECAUSE of it. We were really on our own to test our footing and help each other along with verbal warnings and outstretched hands for mutual support and balance. Quite the bonding session for us two couples. Oh, this here is the end point, the estuary where we eventually rendezvoused with the main body. Everyone was happily splashing around and having a cool, soaking wet ball of a time.

Back on the farm, we braved the ropes confidence course strung up over the recreational pond. Lots of challenges that tested our balance or face the consequences of landing in the drink. Overhead, storm clouds were brewing...

Inexplicably, the storm that was threatening to wash out our afternoon only resulted in this gorgeous rainbow that stretched across the sky.

The rec pond was great for messing about in boats -- and bamboo rafts.

This was supposed to be our BBQ campfire. But we knew only so many war songs and tribal dances that hitting the sack early was our next best option. We chose #2.

Lots more pix: click here.

Premature graduation

Said our official goodbyes to our 08' JC2s in a little ceremony that comprised mostly nostalgic yet inspirational speeches and well wishes for the future. The latter included a collection of largely self-deprecating video postcards created by the various IP departments just to send the kids off with a smile and a wave.

In truth, I will miss my earnest 06, my giggly 23 and my bewildered 17. We still have a few more weeks to go before the finals, so I don't really have to let go of you yet. Daily consultation slots will remain open as long as you want them.

Must thank 06 for the hand-crafted book of personal well-wishes for me. I enjoyed reading all your positive reinforcement and was amazed by the effort you put into the presentation.

Meantime, I'm heading out-of-town north over the long weekend. Time to reconnect with the wilderness; to commune with nature; to slow down our pace of life -- far from the maddening crowd. Where I'm going, there's not likely to be broadband so I doubt I'll be updating for a couple of days. Hopefully, when I return here I'll have some colourful pix to brighten up all this drab text. Cya!

Not a level field

Study all you want. Ace the 'A's and aim for a place at the U. But apart from attaining a glowing transcript, there's still one little hurdle to conquer -- the university interview. Here's where we separate the merely studious from the true survivors of the kind of cranial gymnastics a good university education should encompass.

The latter are the ones who appreciate that curriculum content amounts to a sum total of zero at this level of study and hence do not rely on it exclusively to get by. The true survivor knows that context is everything. Context gives content meaning and application. Context stretches content and makes connections with other content regardless of subject area. Muggers, therefore, focused as they are on learning by the book don't usually have a very good time at the U. There are simply too many books to learn in the library.

We've heard that at the university interview, we get asked strange questions that don't seem to relate to the subject of the course we are applying for. That's because grades alone are insufficient to assess the capabilities of applicants. Two candidates with exactly the same top grades competing for a place at the U are not necessarily playing on a level field. The one who is able to process and contextualise content will always have the advantage over the one who can merely retrieve it.

Oxbridge has released some of these odd interview questions and some successful candidates' responses to them. Don't bother learning the answers 'cos I'm sure the questions won't always be the same. Just get your nose out of your book and open your eyes to the world.

Swift action

When Gov Schwarzenegger says he will take 'swift action' on an issue, he doesn't kid around. When pix of his Missus caught in the act of driving while chatting on her cell phone (made illegal in California by his own personal autograph) surfaced on a celeb gossip site, that's what he promised. On the exact same day, the Gov made good on his promise. Rest assured, with his fine solution, that transgression will NEVER happen again.

The last 100m

Education is one of the last industries that follows a seasonal schedule. Today, I've delivered my last lecture for the year. As the kids are preparing for their finals, our attention goes towards personal and small group consultations. Time to focus on specific kids targeting their specific problems in the subject and helping them deal with it. I'm busier than ever now that I have to entertain individual students, but this really is the best kind of teaching; directed, focused, customized... and appreciated.

Clear and conspicuous

Not sure what hold the US FTC has over our MDA, but it seems we S'porean bloggers likewise will have to come clean and "make clear and conspicuous disclosures" of any rewards we might have received for endorsing products or services in our blogs.

Not sure which consumers make their purchasing decisions based on a single blogger's opinion of a consumable item, but we do have a civic and moral duty to protect the uncritical buyer from biased reviews.

So I'll pre-empt the imminent legislation and hereby clearly and conspicuously disclose that I have not received any rewards whatsoever from any producer or distributor of any of the consumables I have reviewed to date. In fact, keeping this blog has yielded neither financial nor in-kind benefits of any sort for me, but instead is sending me to the poor-house for buying with my own money a whole bunch of stuff to review just for the heck of it.

If not for my predilection towards hearing the sound of my own waffle, and for the grand total of roughly three (3) daily readers who have sustained me over five (5) years of postings, I'd say blogging is as un-rewarding an activity as it gets, contrary to what the FTC-MDA collective might think.

Loss leader

Where in this economy of rising prices can we find any product or service the price of which has reduced? Believe it or not, my usual $4.80 haircut cost me $2.80 when I went for my quarterly shearing yesterday. Where the place? Snip Avenue, 418 Yishun.

Service was brusque but that's the way I like it. I was there for a haircut, not chit-chat. I got what I asked for, and for what I paid that was more than satisfactory.

Chances are, they're using this pricing model as a loss leader. It'll entice clients who want more than just a haircut and from there they'll start the real commercial negotiations. But they're happy to take in cheapos like me too because at least I represent a bum on a seat in between the real customers. Win already!

When 100% is not enough

If we accept the theory of evolution as true, then S'poreans deserve to be the first species to go extinct.

Look at the fuss and furore over this year's PSLE math paper. Kids are crying, and parents of kids who are crying are "up in arms" and threatening to storm Castle FrankenMOE with torches and pitchforks. What monstrosity has arisen out of the beleaguered castle this time? Only the hideous spectre of an exam that was difficult to score 100% in.

And why do I assess the local citizenry to be deserving of extinction? It's because we've proven yet again (as we did two years ago) that we're too easily satisfied, too complacent in thinking that 100% = everything. That kind of thinking is what's going to kill us all.

There are certain assumptions that go with a score of 100% in a written exam. 1) It means having studied all there is to learn of the subject. 2) It means all conditions played out to one's best advantage in order for every problem to be solved within the time limit.

The first assumption cannot be true because knowledge is too infinite to confine within the limited scope of a curriculum of study. 100% therefore means we're satisfied with what we know, and there's nothing more to learn.

As for the second assumption, perfect results means perfect conditions, and perfect conditions seldom occur in real life. In truth, perfect conditions usually occur when we lower the bar of our expectations and accept fudged standards as "good enough".

Always gunning for 100% is dangerously closed-minded, especially for kids aspiring to pursue further education in Math and the Sciences. 100% is good enough for lab techs and test-tube washers (do what you're told -- get 100% every time!), but unacceptable to leading edge researchers who are constantly working to devise new methods to learn more about our universe. Trial and Error. The journey, not the destination.

We cannot afford to breed a generation of children who think 100% is an end in itself. Going by their response, parents aren't helping here. This fixation is a mental rot that will translate into their children's lives, making them unable to cope with the need to think and read beyond their curriculum, the need to sometimes reach beyond our perceptions of "necessary" and "possible" in order to create and maintain this "knowledge economy" we are struggling to remake ourselves into.

It's not the kids who aren't scoring 100% anyway that I'm worried about, but the ones that are and are now viewing themselves as failures because for them only 100% will do. Unfortunately, they're to ones who represent our best and brightest, and if their minds remain trapped in the 100% box, I shudder for the rest of us who will fall under their leadership one day. Most likely, it'll be their parents who will be making their decisions and wiping their noses for them at the same time. A recipe for disaster, if I ever saw one.

Please, don't be content with a hundred per cent. Rather, score below and work for mo' (or MOE! Heh.)

Pain in a bottle

At Sunset:

Our table: half-dozen buffalo wings, Level 5.

Immediate neighbouring table: half-dozen buffalo wings, Level 30!

Ok, I'm not sure how Sunset's Levels compare with the official Scoville-scale that runs into the millions of units, but To*ny was already being (as Wayne described) "dramatic" over his Level 5 wing. At the next table the two Aussies, after some of their own dramatics, plunged into their Level 30s, while making sure everyone around them knew the magnitude of the feat they were attempting.

We were an easy mark for them to ham up to, right up to them offering one of us (i.e., To*ny, though Wayne was seriously assessing his own level of bravado) a wing, but failing which came round with their plate and gave each of us a finger dip of evil red sauce just to savour on the tips of our tongues. As a dutiful audience, we absolutely and publicly confirmed to the other diners in the restaurant that just a smudge of Level 30 was unadulterated liquid pain in a bottle.

It starts out with no sensation, then as the seconds tick by the intensity of the burn builds up until all consciousness collapses into a single shard of focus on the points of direct contact between lips, tongue and throat and the liquid sauce that probably originated from Seletar Airport's jet fuel supplies. Both June and To*ny reported temporary auditory dysfunction, though that was not my experience.

Amy, HP and Mel were content to just sit back and watch our self-immolation.

I think our confirmation of the two guys' insanity gratified them more than both the cert they received and having their names pasted on the Wall honouring those who have completed the challenge. There is no bravery without an incredulous audience to witnesses the performance.

Congrats, Mr Black Dog and buddy! You've inspired Wayne to come back next time and try Level 6!

Paperless clinic

Bukit Batok Polyclinic goes paperless: "no paper trail... from registration to check-out." But I have to ask, what about my MC? Oh, and the toilets? Hmm, not stocking toilets could help ANA enforce their go-before-you-fly approach to reducing aircraft carbon emissions. As long as they don't serve baked beans in-flight.

Random. Sorry.

Talking c*ck on TV

On his nationally televised talk show, Mr Letterman confesses his indiscretions and the consequences are a nasty letter from NOW, and an angry wife and co-workers to whom he makes a public apology. On another talk show halfway around the world, Mr Abdul-Jawad "brags" about his exploits on national TV and gets handed a 5-year jail sentence and 1000 lashes.

When are East and West ever going to find any common ground from which even the faintest glimmer of hope for peace between the two can spark? Not in this lifetime, anyway.

Gaming and youth

see more Funny Graphs

And S'pore kids too, apparently. lolz.

MUA2 side mission tips (spoiler alert)

I hate to brag, but I can be justifiably proud of myself for unlocking the entire team roster in MUA2 on Hard mode. On the Wii, that means completing all the Bonus Missions within the time limit and garnering a quota of points after which the character becomes playable as a team member in the main quest.

The more challenging missions are the solo ones, so I'll share the secrets of some of my successes here.

Jean Grey: use telekenesis (hold B) to slam those cranky bipedal bombs into the cars, thus clearing them easily and quickly so there's more time to devote to the battle with the Grey Gargoyle.

Gambit: use 52 Pickup liberally to break open boxes, junk and hidden rooms hiding those pesky hard-to-find data disks.

Thing: stun everybody with Hand Clap. 'nuff said.

Green Goblin: Spinning Blades is insanely lethal. Repeatedly 1-shot kill respawing Negative Zone guards until very close to quota, then after setting a bomb in the middle of the irritating electrified room, run for cover and stand at the exit doorway, continuing to kill guards until the exit door opens. As long as Gobby remains in the doorway, he can't be electrocuted.

Venom: Same mission as Gobby, except without the bomb setting task. Venom is easier because the mission allows a full team complement. Just keep killing respawning guards until quota.

Songbird: The most challenging thing is to keep the scientists she is escorting alive through the whole mission. Cast Sonic-Scream Shield and refresh often to keep her healthy and enemies weak. When she gets to a door, use Crushing Discord BEFORE opening it to kill enemies on the other side. She can hit them through the door, but they can't hit her. While Crushing Discord is good to use on Light mutants, Shrieking Slice works better on Heavies and Moonstone (Boss). Alternate the attacks when facing Moonstone 'cos Light mutants are attcking the scientists at the same time.

So, getting the whole team was do-able after all. Now the next challenge is to attain the Gold bonuses: same missions, higher quota of points to aim for.

Edit 01:

Huh! Been put in my place by the ST reviewer. Game is too easy, he says. So what? I like easy games.

Fishing for ideas

Gained a little insight into the kids' thought processes as they select essay questions. Facing 12 possible questions, they brainstorm as many anecdotal examples as they can think of per question, thus eliminating the questions they have no examples for. This wouldn't be a bad way to narrow 12 choices if not for the fact that most of the time they end up eliminating all 12, leaving the final option of 'whatever' which they then proceed to write -- example after example after example randomly associated with the topic area in question but with no regard to the question itself.

The kids are puzzled because they are not getting the rewards they think they are entitled to just because they've been able to re-tell several brain-cell killing pointless anecdotes they've forced themselves to study. They did study, didn't they? So why aren't they scoring like they expect? Simple, examples don't answer questions, no matter how long the list. I mean, examples are a fine and necessary thing, it's just that they alone are not the answer we're looking for.

If the question is "why?" the answer is "because." If the question is "should?" the answer is "why (or why not)." If the question is "how far" the answer is "under these specific conditions." If we think about answering the question, paying respect to its particular demands, then from a list of 12 questions, we have 12 options from which to choose our favourite.

By addressing the question, the relevant supporting evidence will surface without much effort. That is, as long as the kids have been keeping up with their daily readings. That's because the right context will locate the appropriate content. It's the difference between fishing in the ocean with random bait and fishing in a fish farm with a net. Ocean fishing is fun, but if we don't use the right bait we have no idea what we're going to catch, if anything at all. Fish farm fishing is hardly sporting, but we know what we're fishing for every time and we'll catch what we want.

GP is different. Unlike the other content subjects, we don't care what you KNOW. We care about what you THINK and if you have good reasons for thinking that way. Which is why our kids are still all lost at sea.

MUA2 comes up short

The Wii version of MUA2 has less going for it than the PS3/360 version. I was wrong about alternate costumes -- there aren't any. Likewise, there aren't any special team bonuses for particular quartet combinations. And no special dialogues between particular character combinations. There are fewer cutscenes and storyline missions too. Overall, the game (regardless of whether we're playing Pro or Anti Registration) is short, lacking the cosmological scope of the previous MUA. :P

These little features don't really add all that much to the overall gameplay, but they are nice little touches, like garnish on meat and potatoes. The meal is still quite substantial, but the presentation doesn't make us go 'wow'. If the previous MUA didn't have them, I wouldn't have been looking for them in this one. But to remove them from the follow up is short-changing us players on quality while substituting it with, um... nothing. Well, the control system is easier to use, I'll give them that.

Ok, anyway, I think the best characters to have on the team are either Iceman or the Invisible Woman for powerful ranged attacks, a psionic like Jean Grey or Psylocke who can fusion with a bruiser like the Thing or the Hulk for a player-guided "Billiard Ball" attack (creates a hamsterball around said bruiser who then charges masses of enemies for huge damage -- even bosses don't stand up to this kind of assault for long). The fourth member can be just about anyone else, 'cos they're just coming along for the ride.

Don't get me wrong. I am having loads of fun with MUA2 as it is. There are still lots of team combinations and fusions I have yet to try out, and side-quests yet to conquer. They haven't taken the best bits out of the game, but it could have been so much tastier.

Talented and bemused

These are the days of messing around with a video camera and shooting my friends and colleagues for a short little thing that will soon see the light of day.

We're shooting under very tight constraints, yet I've amazed myself in being able to capture the primary footage as of yesterday evening, and already get the rushes edited by this evening.

Wish I could say more about the final product, but there's still some post-production left to be done. The good news is that despite my deadline worries, I will deliver to my client on time after all. No extensions necessary.

Couldn't have done it without the cooperation of my talented and bemused co-workers who lent their faces and bodies to the shoot. I made them do things even though they didn't have much clue how my directions could possibly have made sense, especially since I involved different people in only different fragments of the shoot. Thanks for the trust, people!

Domestic violence

Woke up past midnight from a commotion in the house. There was the sound of scampering feet and unusual vocalizations that were quite unnerving. Turns out that Q-tip had been caught in the act of sniffing around the cats' feeding area, probably trying her luck scrounging for leftovers, and got a pummelling for her indiscretion. Chasing her off apparently wasn't enough. Whoever it was kept taking swipes at Q-tip's retreating behind all the way back to her territory, our bedroom.

When cats take swipes, they do it with claws extended. We found a spot of blood on Q-tip but when we cleaned the wound we found lots more scratches all over her butt and back. She looked like Wolverine had tried to shave her, quite ineptly too.

Back at the crime scene, we examined each cat's claws for blood trace, but the perfect crime had been committed. No blood to be found anywhere to indicate which suspect was the perp. Regardless, each of them will get their claws trimmed today, just to be safe.

98 years old

Been going to the vet's over the last couple of days. Mimi is 14 years old, and though she doesn't look or behave like it, her age is taking its toll. We took her in yesterday for a urinary tract infection and Dr Kasey advised spaying while treating this uncomfortable symptom.

Spaying, as I understand it now, amounts to a hysterectomy and Mimi's womb clearly needed removal. The infection had swollen her womb to several times its normal size, weighing in at 600g. That contributes to quite a sizeable percentage of her total body weight, considering she's quite a small dog to begin with.

Mimi's doing fine as of our visit tonight. She's no longer in an anaesthetized stupor but was very happy to see us. She wolfed down the chix leg we brought for her and paced her cage, barking weakly the whole time, clearly wanting us to take her home. But she needs one more night of observation before she can be discharged. That should be tomorrow night.

Dr Kasey also showed us some other areas of concern including her weakened heart and worrisome-looking liver, and informed us that he was putting her on long-term medication for those problems. But going by her reception of us tonight, there's still a lot of fight in the old girl yet.

Lunchtime toast

There were four of us at Charco's for an off-campus lunch: me with Dee, HP and Jojo. Don't know if she was inspired by Mel singing drinking songs she'd learned in the UK (Mel firmly believes in an all-rounded education) but in the middle of lunch, Jojo raised a glass and offered a toast to our workplace for being the happiest workplace she's ever worked in.

Hear, hear! For those of us who have worked elsewhere before, we can really appreciate the faculty life on our campus. It may not be so obvious to newbie employees who arrive fresh on our doorstep yearning to spread their wings further afield, but to us battle-scarred veterans of the corporate trenches, even amidst the chaos and hubbub of JC academia, I honestly number ourselves among the lucky few who've made it back to Old Blighty.

Undo the damage

There is a very compelling reason why we need to undo the damage to the quality of spoken English around here. I mean, Singlish is fine for friendly, personal, letting-yourself-go social conversation. This localized lingo is one form of culture we can truly say developed naturally from our little island, and is a touchstone of our identity at home and abroad, but it simply won't do as a medium of academic discourse. Especially if the local version of the language is the only one we use, but our written secondary and post-secondary language exams are set and graded by language academics in Cambridge, England.

But exam grades are just one little thing. Rubrics and tolerances balance each other out and collectively, grades simply point which direction the wind is generally blowing. What matters more is the level of engagement our kids have with texts that are not primarily written in the local vernacular and responding to them at the same level.

It's not a matter of which version is 'superior' or 'inferior' but rather whether one's command of language either facilitates or impedes understanding between people trying to communicate with one another. If there is no or little understanding, then there is a failure to communicate. In school terms, either the text is not getting through to the candidate, or the candidate isn't getting through to the marker, or both. Whichever, that is what the 'FAIL' grade pragmatically represents.

But that's just the grade. On the grander scale, too many people stuck in Singlish mode, unable to code-switch to the standard English of academic and intellectual discourse means too many Singaporeans being unable to participate in and contribute to complex and abstract thought.

If this is true, then our Colonial Masters haven't really left. We've just made it easier for them to give us our orders because we're proud to have 'upgraded' ourselves to speak a little more like them. But with this level of language ability, we are still unable to view them on equal terms.

Outside my window

Look at the time. 0213 hrs. I don't have a good reason for being up this late. Nevertheless, here I am sitting on my horrifically clawed sofa and listening the the howl of the wind just outside my apartment windows. And now the rain has just started to come down in large splashy drops. There is going to be such a storm tonight, once the lightning and thunder get going. I'm actually tempted to just stare outside and witness what looks to be a very dramatic climactic event. Maybe I'll do that for five minutes, then try to go to sleep.

Cognitive catatonia

Help! Swamped under with prelim grading. Dunno why it's taking so long. Maybe I'm thinking too hard and being too careful with each question, causing bouts of cognitive catatonia between answer scripts. In that kind of mental state, somnolence sneaks up like a ninja in bedroom slippers and delivers a chop to the back of the neck for the coup de grace.

Cannot. Deadline is too close to fool around. Focus. Focus...

A major change of policy

The industry is putting more emphasis on speech as our new policy for teaching the languages. Hopefully, that will translate into more in-class talk to train more articulate kids. The idea is, I suppose, to avoid further embarrassments when our people get interviewed by the media and the video goes viral over the 'net.

This policy will be interesting to implement in primary and secondary schools. For far too long, too many of them have been tending to operate on the policy of "shut up".

Hopefully, now things will change and in a few years down the road, by the time they get to JC the kids will have been more acculturated to seminar-style discussions in tutorials with more participants contributing views than just the tutor. We've long been waiting for the day.

I no can has faceburger?

So much for vaunted Japanese hospitality. A bear goes berserk sampling tourist-y fare at a bus station in scenic Takayama. It is then herded into a souvenir shop where the employees hold it against its will until in the end, it gets shot dead. Talk about pressure sales tactics! I've heard of tourist traps, but this is ridiculous.

We be travellin'

Yarr tharr, me hearties, an' welcome aboard! Here be ye bucket an' mop; I want me deck swabbed spotless by the time I be done entertainin' ye with me salty sea story. Ok, it be not much, really, but it'll take ye mind off ye sore back and knees fer a wee bit.

We be plannin' a little voyage, the woman and I. Right 'round the Christmas season, ay? We set course as we've always done. Covered up me good eye with me eyepatch an' put a dagger through the old sea chart. Arr... Chiang Mai. Exotic enough for ye, lad? Shut yer hole an' keep swabbin'.

So today we gathers up the last of our doubloons, to pay off our creditors (blood-suckin' scallywags, every last one of them, they be) an' spent -- nay -- invested the remainder on a seaworthy bark an' crew. We be hoistin' the Jolly Roger at the next high tide.

I'm done tellin' me tale, but what's this? Ye missed a spot, lad, ye missed a spot! Lily-livered landlubber, walkin' the plank's too good fer the likes of ye! Be off me deck before Davey Jones hisself comes a'callin' for ye scurvy rum-soaked soul!

In case you haven't figured it out, happy Talk Like a Pirate Day 2009!

Sheepish

This post is late because I done something I don't want to talk about just yet. Let's see how it actually works first before I review whether it sucks or blows. Whichever, all I'm gonna say right now is that perhaps I paid a bit more than was wise. So what else is new?

BFC ventures afield

This is to record the first off-campus meeting of the BFC. This was quite an accomplishment, to get representatives from most of our departments to meet at the local McD's for breakfast before the start of the school day.

Amazed how organized and committed we were about it, with Wayne sending out an SMS reminder the night before, and even President Tommy making a special effort to wake up early and grace our table with his pre-caffeinated presence.

The only item on our agenda was to eat. AOB was about enjoying each other's company and cracking jokes at Tommy's expense while his brain was still in reboot mode.

MUA2: first impressions

When superheroes split apart, forming opposing factions to fight for the cause they feel is right; when hero battles hero with no quarter given even if they had been the closest of allies before, we have a Civil War on our hands and literally so with "Marvel Ultimate Alliance 2" for the Wii.

Gameplay is in a similar format from the original MUA, a 4-hero team of which the player controls one hero, teaming up with the other three to fight waves of enemies. There are basic melee punches and kicks, custom superpowers (special attacks and buffs) for each hero, and the latest addition to the game: "fusion powers" by which team members combine their special abilities in a devastating attack against enemy hoardes. Fusion powers have limited usage, so there's a strategic element in choosing when to use them, and with whom.

The tone of MUA2 seems slightly more serious too. The opening sequences set New York amidst a massive terrorist attack, the perpetrator and her army spouting clearly anti-American sentiments. However, her attack is not unprovoked and this revelation begins unravelling the seam that ties the heroes to a common cause, and sows deep-rooted mistrust against each other.

The player has to choose which side to fight on, Iron-Man's pro-government side or Captain America's personal freedom side. Two sides to choose from allows for two separate story threads with separate missions, and great potential for replayability after playing one story through. Other replayability factors are the vast array of superhero team combinations and their resulting fusion power effects, the strategic use of item buffs (so many items, what's the best combination to use for which situation?) and alternate costumes among the many other unlockables including more heroes to use in the team roster.

Wii controls between MUA and MUA2 are a little different from each other and I have to get used to the new controls. My fingers have to be retrained to use them properly. Less shake for example, and more thumbs-on button mashing.

In MUA2, the isometric perspective brings us a little closer to the action so it's easier to observe character animations, though it's still easy to lose your character in the onscreen chaos. Also for the Wii, activating fusion powers involves pointing the wiimote at the hero you want to "fusion" with and finding the cursor to match with your desired hero can sometimes be a challenge because of the short time limit to "fusion", and sometimes because the hero is out of position for the most effective use of that power. Kids are more likely than grumpy old me to be able to keep track of everything going on at once and make the best of the fusion effect. Me, I'll just do it for the pretty colours.

In between the fighting are cinematic cutscenes that stitch the story together and sets up the next mission. There is decent voice acting, but what I like about the cutscenes, oddly enough, is the superheroes' costumes. The heroes look like they are really wearing clothes and not just having painted-over nude bodies because the artist can't be bothered with such details. The cutscenes make an interesting contrast with the results screens that appear at the end of each mission. The results stats appear on stylized renderings as 2-D artwork which is reminiscent of the comic book medium that inspired the game. Nice touch, I think.

As it is, I've only had time to play through the Prologue. Even then at 'Easy' setting the Boss battle was quite a trial and error -- until I figured out the rules of the game I was supposed to be playing. It was a matter of matching verbal instructions with the automap with the onscreen action, which took my brain a bit more time than usual to process. Duh, slow. But I think I've got the hang of it now.

MUA2 promises to be a fun romp through a dark period in the Marvel archives. I've only scratched the surface of what feels like a ripping story, and there's the other side yet to be explored. That's gonna keep me occupied for a while. 'Arkham Asylum' (released on the same day) will have to wait.

The sky's the limit -- even for student projects

A bit of old news here, but one I stumbled upon only today. It's something to remind me about being open to possibilities rather than pre-conceiving impossibilities when and if I get to supervise another bunch of project groups next year.

What usually holds us back from great projects that work is that we constrain them tightly within the parameters of the exam question, and there we have the edges of the box, clearly defined for us -- the lines we are not supposed to colour outside of. The question then has to be, "how big is your box?" Well, as far as the students involved in the story (above) were concerned, the box was as big as the stratosphere.

Projects don't have to be microscopic for the sake of 'manageability' and 'feasibility'. The beauty of the subject of Project Work is that if the size of the project overflows the box, the project can still take on a life of its own. The important thing is that it's meaningful, it's real, and it's done. And by the time the examination comes around, we'll find that the box is in fact infinitely enlargeable.

Historical interlude

Not much to add for today. Everyone's back at work, including Mel who's finally back from her Dreamtime. Busy, grading prelim papers, and everything else. So I'll let the vid below entertain you for a change. So nostalgic, these scenes of pre-WW2 S'pore. For historical interest only.

Mmm, more mussels

First, I have to apologise to Cat and Sam for taking a rain check on our lunch date. It completely slipped our minds that June and I had a prior engagement for a detoxing treatment until we got a late reminder yesterday.

We'll get our dates right next time, 'k?

Anyway, after detoxing we went straight back to devouring this lovely pot of Belgian mussels (moules au vin blanc). We've had our eye on Oosters at Suntec City for a while already, and since we were in the neighbourhood, we couldn't pass up the opportunity.

All we needed between ourselves was this 1kg pot of mussels, cooked soft and tender, simmering in this clear vegetable soup that was knockout delish. But that's not all, this order also comes with a side of fries and two dipping sauces: creamy mayo and honey-mustard. That would actually have sufficed, but we got greedy and shared an onion soup as well. A bit salty, that one, but a liberal sprinkling of parmesan put things right... for me, at least.

Although this place prides itself with its range of imported beers, it served ice-cold water to us two cheapos at no charge. Nice.

Rag(dolls) against the Machine

"9" is a melange of plot elements from "Terminator", "Half-Blood Prince" and PS3's "LittleBigPlanet". The leading characters are LBP's Sackboy-like ragdolls numbered from 1 to 9, each with his (or her in 7's case) own personality traits. They are mechanical beings physically, but are animated with a life force that is a source of both energy and intelligence for them.

The ragdolls are the only semblance of life remaining on a completely devastated world that has seen a global war between organic life and machines, with the machines coming out tops. Nothing biological has been spared, and in a macabre twist to functionality, the self-replicating machines salvage human and animal bones to incorporate into their own designs.

The ragdolls are hopelessly outmatched as they seek sanctuary from the marauding machines. It is only when 9, the latest and most improved model, awakens that sanctuary is no longer an option because he holds the secret to bringing life back to the world. He just has to discover what it is first, by piecing together the clues left behind by his creator. Complication: he doesn't get it right the first time and as a result makes a bad problem even worse.

This was a fun movie to watch because the trials these tiny ragdolls have to undergo seem so insurmountable. The balance of combat strength between them and their mechanical adversaries is completely asymetrical, but they do prevail with ingenuity, cooperation and a pretty strong survival instinct. But frail as they are, some sacrifices are made along the way.

It may be animated, but it isn't cute. It has rather dark themes too, so it's not really meant for the kiddies. Just as well. I'd say with the complex story, the drama and pathos, and the quirky bizarreness of the entire concept, "9" is one of the better movies of this year.

On the 5th day, he rested

Tired of my labours, I took the day to just enjoy lunch with NBS whom I haven't seen in ages. Well, since Monday, anyway. She's been doing me a small favour of which I don't have the liberty to discuss here. Spoilt myself with a carbonara and an RB float at New York New York. Not sure what my Wii Fit taskmaster would say about that, and I don't intend to find out. The Wii stays off today.

NBS noted how I've been spending the week wandering the island alone. I have to acknowledge that that is the reality of my situation. Looking ahead, when it's time for me to retire, the people I hang out with now will be only just peaking at their careers. There's a gap of a whole decade at least before the oldest of them will be able to join me rocking our chairs, together on the porch of our retirement home while we watch the world go down in flames.

But what the heck am I supposed to do for 10 years until then? And in the meantime, a lot of things could happen in 10 years, especially for someone that advanced in age. So either I get used to my own company, or I keep right on working and staying relevant to the world. Thus all the more reason for me to keep fit, healthy and active now, while I'm still able. After all, retirement is for old people, not me.

Thankfully, there's still June, though I wonder how she'll cope with a sexagenerian juvenile in the house? But why scare myself now? All that is still far off in the future. Let's just cross that bridge when we get there.

Knees, quads, glutes

Healthy activity du jour: A short but intense burst of 'blading at ECP

Distance: 5-6 km

Time: 1 hr.

Mundane stuff for today. Think my wheels are getting worn out 'cos I'm moving only with a lot of effort, and it's difficult to pick up any significant speed.

Felt the burn early in the knees, quads and glutes. But the pain went away as I kept pushing, and after a while, I felt I could have pushed further than I actually did. Guess that means I'm making good progress.

Kinda' makes me wonder how I'm going to find the time to keep up all this healthy activity when term begins again next week. It's almost like work and being healthy are mutually exclusive propositions.

Segway adventure

Today's healthy activity: er... well, it wasn't all that strenuous, actually. Segway riding along Tanjong and Siloso Beaches

Distance: does it matter?

Time: 1 hour

I've always wanted to ride one of these things. They seem so practical to use, so easy to get around with, and they look like a lot of fun too.

The Segway is really an expensive kick-scooter without needing the kick. The motor is battery-powered, charged from an ordinary wall socket.

The controls are intuitive, easily picked up as soon as you get on board. Lean forward to move forward and the further you lean the faster you go. Likewise lean left and right to wheel in the direction of the lean. To decelerate, lean back or return to vertical to halt. The handle grips mostly function as a point of reference so you brain knows which way to lean, but they don't actually steer the device. Just shifting your weight does the trick. Oh yeah, the handles are also a way to steady yourself over bumpy terrain.

Sentosa is the only location in S'pore that operates the business of Segway riding. The facility is at Beach Station where they offer a basic fun package, and a beach "adventure" -- guided, of course. I opted for the latter. Cost $35, and because I was alone I got a guide immediately (normally, there's a 1 hour pre-booking for a guide).

My guide was an affable chap who engaged me in easy conversation throughout the ride. Because it was just me and him, and he seemed to think I could handle my Segway with ease, after a while he raised my speed limiter from 8km/h to 20. I still couldn't catch up with him, though, and I didn't really want to. Didn't want him to think I was some kind of danger to myself and others and cut short our ride. He took the pix, in case you're wondering.

Riding the Segway is effortless fun. Once the speed limiter is off, it really moves. It requires only a little fine motor control and is quite maneuverable even within crowds of pedestrians, up and downslope even.

As a workout, it didn't work anything to speak of. Maybe an hour in the sun helped me to sweat out toxins, but that's about it. But if anyone (LTA?) is thinking of cutting off vehicular traffic from the CBD and Orchard areas, Segway rentals could be one way to do it!

Bedok Park Connector finally found!

Today's healthy activity: Cycling the Bedok Park Connector.

Total distance: 12.4km (return)

Timing: 2+ hrs

This is the reason we never found the Bedok Park Connector, though we tried several times before. The entrance is blocked by all these construction barriers.

Finally, the entrance -- found! A steep flight of stairs leads to the tunnel under and across the ECP. There's no slope; bikes have to be manually carried down then up the stairs.

First checkpoint: Strange radio tower at the Guards' Camp.

The cycling path takes us on a tour of people's backyards and under the MRT line.

Across the canal is Big Eater, where we feasted on salt egg crab the other day. We had no idea how close we were to the elusive Park Connector we had been looking for.

After a number of traffic light pedestrian crossings, we finally reach an overhead bridge. Please alight and push your bicycle across.

Looking back from the bridge. The sky is overcast, though no rain. Perfect weather for bike-riding. No tan lines!

Earlier on, we had a little argument whether this was a canal for drainage or a concretized river. Turns out the former. The water filling the canal earlier represented high tide from the sea. The closer to the source, the drier the canal is. Can't be a river, then.

Finally, objective achieved. ECP to Bedok Reservoir Park. Discovered several other Park Connectors branching out from here. Decided not to push it but u-turned and headed back the way I came. Scroll back up slowly for the route details.

Lane workout

Today's healthy activity: bowled three straight games. Focused on keeping centred, balanced and vertical through the line-up, push-off and follow through. Also conscious of breathing and maintaining a steady rhythm, more like yoga rather than a strength/cardio workout. Everything felt aligned, except the release which tended to be inconsistent and untidy. Need more work there.

Three game average: 153, not too bad considering I haven't bowled in months.

Up early for Tiong Bahru tsui kueh

First day of the September hols. Not really much of a hol, just a short break from routine. Woke up early nonetheless for brekkie at Tiong Bahru market. Dunno why but I had a craving for the famous tsui kueh from there. Early because there we had to beat the crowd.

Parking was already crappy by the time we got there (though I got lucky with a lot just at the market entrance). Whole place has been upgraded. It's now a two-storey complex with the wet market on the ground floor and cooked food upstairs.

Was worried that the food would have been likewise 'upgraded', but the tsui kueh is still good, the shell maintaining its silky smooth texture, and the chye poh (pickled radish) filling a delicate balance of salt and sweet. Not too oily.

Oh, this stall is the one with the less flashy signage. We picked it 'cos it looked more genuine. Think we made the right choice.

Feel the burn

Since I got myself a Wii Balance Board, I might as well try putting in about 30 minutes of fitness activity regularly from now on. By stating my intent here, I'm hoping it will be the motivation I need to keep me going if my commitment should waver.

According the the Wii Fit assessor, my Wii Fit age is still quite a few years below my actual age, so that's good news. But my BMI is high so I'll be working to reduce that figure to a more acceptable level.

There is quite a variety of exercises on the Wii Fit um, game, that work on balance, strength, aerobics and yoga. They are surprisingly intense (or maybe that's just my level of unhealthiness talking) and as we progress, more exercises get unlocked.

These aren't exactly the kind of exercises to build Arnold-grade mass, but they're non-threatening, with encouraging virtual instructors that praise and analyse performance on-the-spot.

As of today, my Wii Fit age is 36 years. Let's see if consistent daily workouts really do have any effect on my 2-month goal...

Exhibitionist

Got to see what life was like on the other side of the exhibition counter. I'm not usually the go-to guy for this sort of thing, but times being what they are...

Anyway, iLine needed a partner with wheels and a little muscle for the heavy lifting, and since Amy wasn't available, nor X, Y or Z, I was the next logical choice. So both iLine and I set up our booth at Cedar's career festival thingy to publicize our college as an option for the girls' next port-of-call on their way up the Education pyramid.

Our collaterals were the three standees we used as the backdrop, and our giveaways: our standard flyers, our custom bottles of distilled water, and our little bags of AAA-grade rice. It was the rice that was unusual enough to be the first item to disappear from our display. They made great conversation pieces 'cos the girls wanted to know wassup with the rice?

Truth be told, I'm not actually part of the crew that gets sent to these events, so I don't actually know the standard pitch that go with these materials. However, this was an opportunity to invent wild associations about how rice is a staple, it's nutritious, it's down-to-earth, and its triple-A grade is meant to symbolize the triple-A experience they will receive in our care, should they become our students next year. Oh, and it also reminds us of home and family, which as a college, is one of our more identifying and endearing features... if you like that kind of thing.

There were other more mundane questions as well, practical things like our cut-off, curricula and co-curricula programmes, success rates. The usual.

Not sure we made that great an impact in the end. We were only one out of many competing exhibitors, after all. I guess I'll only know when I see some familiar faces in my tutorials next year.

The lull

And now we have come to the final official test the class of 08 will be taking before their finals at the end of the year. I've taught them everything I know, I've consulted everyone that wanted consultation, and I can only sit back and watch reality put the endgame into gear for them.

This evening is one I'll enjoy sans guilt... before the grading begins again. Tomorrow.

Night Safari, almost

Today will be known as the day we almost made it to visit the Night Safari. But this being a school night, and the fact that we still have work tomorrow morning, our collective weekend anticipation dried up as the day progressed. Thank reality for bringing us back to our senses.

Meantime, what used to be the North Pole is experiencing such drastic climate change that it has temporarily become the Sahara Desert. Yes, the air-conditioning has broken down again. :p

Rah rah for Sports Resort

The perfect Teachers' Day off is with "Wii Sports Resort" that comes with the much anticipated Wii Motion Plus attachment. All it takes is a quick update from the game disk, and we're good to go.

Sports Resort is the new Wii Sports, with more games to play and all set within a coherent theme: the resort island of... Wahu! Now, doesn't that sound like all-out fun? It is, with a tiny element of cute to boot -- I love tossing Frisbees for my little doggie to catch. He jumps somersaults to celebrate perfect catches.

The Motion Plus attachment really does add a dimension of fine motor control to the old remote controller. As I swing my controller, my sword in the fencing game moves exactly the same way, as does my table tennis bat with more precision and accuracy than before. Now, losing a game cannot be blamed on a dodgy controller, it's down to player skill alone.

I miss tennis and baseball from the previous incarnation but Sports Resort makes up for them with lots more games and challenges in so many varieties. Now to find a few more friends to play with...

Teachers' Day 09

X23 are always bright, cheery and enthusiastic, and here they are celebrating Teachers' Day with me. I appreciate their gift of a notebook (the paper type) with their personal messages written in the pages. I'll also thank x06 for thoughtfully feeding me with a tray of tarts, and for a little cactus plant that I promise to take good care of. Erm, my last cactus plant came from June, and it died within a month due to over-care. Think I watered it too often and it drowned. Will do my best not to let that happen again. Also x17 for the hand-made card with a group photo of them wearing H1N1 masks with big smiles drawn over them. I've had three great tutorials from this batch, quite a pleasure to teach and I will miss 'em when they graduate... too soon.

This is the campus think-tank. We got interviewed by campus news on our role and function since we are making a publicity push for our committee and our activities. Doubt we're in the brain-trust because we're particularly smart. It's more like telling the college that if we can think, then everyone else should have no problem. Something like that.

Wandered far afield for lunch to celebrate. The usual lunch party found out the hard way that Baba King was closed on Mondays. Activated Plan B: Big Eater (Upp Changi Rd) for seafood in the afternoon. Their specialty was the salted egg crab. Despite the dubious-sounding combination, it turned out pretty ok. Heh, as long as the crabmeat is firm and chunky, I'm giving it the thumbs up.

Cheers, everyone! And have a happy Teachers' Day!

Laughing till it hurt

In the entire cinema hall, I was laughing the loudest at the antics of Bruno. Was I trying to prove to the rest of the audience (just a handful of us today) that I "got it?" -- every single prank, every single awkward moment, and laughter was my best way of covering up the embarrassment?

I dunno. As a movie, "Bruno" is genuinely situationally and absurdly funny, but at the same time playing a caricature along with real people who won't see the joke, let alone play along with it, it felt like SB Cohen was trying too hard to get the laughs. My laughs. And I guess I kinda' felt bad for him, and I did pay for two movie tix to watch him in action, so I felt obligated.

The Cohen formula is to piss people off by making them encounter the things they revile the most. And surprisingly, these people still respond to the silly Bruno with more restraint than we'd give them credit for. They still try to salvage some dignity from the inimaginable situations they find themselves in with him, and as far as possible still try to treat him with some measure of respect.

What results is that "Bruno" has to go to great lengths to sacrifice his own dignity to get some kind of reaction that at times I don't know if I'm laughing at the reactions or at Bruno himself. Whichever it is, it is funny, I am laughing, but the humour is painful. It's one of those cases where someone has worked so hard at something that you feel bad if you don't reward the effort.

Oh my red face and aching ribs.

Wrap. Print. Party!

A production still from last week's shoot. Here we see Weng briefing his talent about the coffee mug scene. Coffee looks pretty strong in this photo.

At the wrap party tonight, Weng debuted his rough cut for the entire cast and crew. I must say, although the raw footage didn't look like much, after editing and with the inclusion of the mood-setting background music the final product looked very good indeed.

Most importantly, the client was pleased as Punch with it. Said he had plans to air the final copy around the region. He can't wait to see how the regional offices will react to it.

As for my role, I had a single line of dialogue and a shot of my very talented left arm holding the coffee mug. Yes, that one in the picture.

Teachers' Day dinner interruptions

Usually at Teachers' Day dinner, our objective of enjoying our meal counters the MCs' objective of interrupting our enjoyment with silly games and activities to "enliven" the evening. At tonight's dinner, the role of the latter fell to me, Fen, YF and iLine, to deliver a programme based on the theme of the Oscars.

To be honest, we weren't all that prepared for the task even though we'd agreed to it months ago. The scripting mostly comprised a flurry of hasty email back-and-forths based on a rough guideline of the programme and coordinating MC patter in English and Mandarin. We were still scripting lines right up to our sequence run -- I wouldn't call it a rehearsal 'cos we were only running lines and not working out movement, traffic patterns, transitions and technical coordination.

Adding to the nerve-wracking situation were the many dynamic changes in programe, including a formal toast by the VIPs that was not previously scheduled. And although the programme was going faster than expected we were instructed to hurry up even faster. We ended up saying goodbye to everybody before dessert! I think that was win-win for all of us. Heh.

But this is the job of the MC. It's not theatre where there's time to figure things out and plan for contingencies (and even then things still do screw up). For us MCs, we ran lines for the formal bits of programme -- it's the formal bits that are the most scary 'cos it's unseemly to mess up people's names and titles --and here, reading off cuecards became an absolute necessity for me. My runs without cuecards were disastrous.

But rehearsals apart, most of our air-time was ad lib, going with the flow and trying our best to converse coherently between Fen and myself in two separate languages. Oddly enough, I felt more relaxed with the ad libs than the formal bits. It was fun to run the games and introduce the performances 'cos then I could focus on what was necessary rather than fret over not getting it wrong.

Fen and I had a great table to retreat to in between stage appearances. Thanks for keeping food for us, encouraging us with chatter, playing our games, impromptu rehearsing the formal toast with me, and doing some behind-the-scenes running that was necessary to keep the programme flowing smoothly. My on-stage tribute to you guys was sincere, if inadvertently cut short by an over-enthu Fen.

MC'ing for a combined three schools needed more prep time. There were many niggling mechanical problems, gaffed lines, moments of awkward tongue-tiedness, nervous voices cracking, for a functional but unpolished product. Nevertheless, we had excellent tech support in Events Architects who improv'ed effortlessly with us yet were very understated and nearly invisible the whole time. Their presence covered up a lot of sins.

Overall, I think we did ok. Not great, but a serviceable job despite our nerves and inexperience. It helped a lot that the audience was as generous as it was.

And now, I'm going to take a whole weekend off. Zzzzz...

Criminals, all of you!

Whoever designed the survey for Ipos may have arranged it such that our local intellectual property watchdog got only the feedback it wanted to hear. TNP summarises:

"IN THE real world, almost all of the 100 Singaporeans polled by The New Paper believe that stealing goodies from a store is wrong.

But they feel it's okay to illegally download copyrighted material from the Internet. In another survey of 1,011 Singaporeans done by the Intellectual Property Office of Singapore (Ipos), released this April, about 44 per cent of Singaporeans think that illegal downloads of copyrighted material is not considered theft."

The more people appear to have unlightened views about respecting intellectual property, the more justification Ipos has for continuing its crusade. And the more reason it has to consider punitive measures, like the new 'three strikes' law, against these all these unrepentant criminal scumbags.

But take a look at the two survey questions given to the respondents:

1) Is it wrong to illegally download music, movies and shows?

40% of total said NO which shows how hardcore recalcitrant they are to willfully commit an illegal act.

If it's illegal, then of course it's wrong, hence 60% said YES. But the answer might have been more interesting if the question had been, "Is it wrong to download music, movies and shows?" Chances are, remove the word "illegal" and 100% will say NO. And since they aren't admitting to committing an illegal act, 100% of them won't think they are criminals.

2) Is it wrong to buy pirated CDs, VCDs and DVDs?

Only 26% of total said NO, which means most people DO think buying such stuff is wrong.

Of course buying pirated CDs, VCDs, and DVDs is wrong. Why waste money on pirated goods when you can download the same thing for free (see Q1)? Duh!

Ipos needs better, less confused, less ambiguous data if it really wants to act in the best interests of society. As it is, they see criminals everywhere, though the people don't quite see themselves as such. Getting all litigious isn't the solution. Enforcement doesn't make a law right, not if the people aren't convinced it is in the first place.

The industry's next leap forward

For the week I'm having, I suppose this is a good reminder why. Presenting our industry's new 'mantra' that'll take us into the 2010s: Lead. Care. Inspire. Not sure why the first word refers to a toxic heavy metal, but we'll do our best.