Been avoiding meeting my fund manager 'cos he gets long-winded and reminds me about things I don't really want to think about, i.e., my financial state now and in the years to come. Considering he's already taken most of what's left of my cash, I don't really have much of a "now". I can only hope that there will be a "to come" as promised.

His news today was mainly to update June and me about the performance of our investments to date, just a little more than 6 months since we let him handle our money. So far, a modest little profit; well, better than bank rate, anyway, so maybe we won't fire him just yet.

The one thing I got out of our discussions today is the realization that under normal circumstances, I realistically only have 13 more years of working life before I reach retirement age. 13 years to build up sufficient resources to see me comfortably into my dotage, assuming accident, disease, stupidity or the economy don't get me first.

Fund managers. They sure are well trained in scaring cash right out of a guy's pockets.

But as I said to TSL on Friday, I don't really have ideals about retirement. The idea of lolling around all day watching people go by doesn't appeal to me. No retirement for me, I told her, I doubt I'll be happy if I don't work till the end. If there's one thing I can't stand, it's being or becoming irrelevant. That's even scarier to me than having no money.